When was the last time you’ve asked yourself this question?
Bringing fun to people was my job for 25 years as a professional clown. Looking back, I have to admit that I didn’t put enough effort into having fun for myself. I did what I loved, made enough money, but still, I was missing out on the fun.
For one, I took things way too seriously. That resulted in working 24/7. If I wasn’t performing, I was working on a new show. If I wasn’t working on a new show, I was doing my marketing, my website, my paperwork etc. It never stopped. I made a big mistake, thinking I could do it all by myself.
I forgot that I only had one life.
For a long time, I was happy with it. I thought it was the thing to do. Deep down I knew was doing something wrong, but I didn’t know better. My passion drove me, but ultimately that passion killed me. At some point, I didn’t love what I was doing anymore.
And to make matters worse, I felt unhappy and misunderstood. I wanted to be respected because I worked so hard. I felt I wasn’t getting the reward I deserved.
I stopped having a social life and forgot how to party and have fun. My job wasn't fun anymore. Seems hard to believe now, when I’m writing it down.
Life was all about work. Everyone else thought I was having the time of my life, but it was far from that.
Giving up my passion was the hardest thing I ever did. I felt a failure despite all my accomplishments and didn’t know what to do. I tried having a ‘normal job'. The deep unhappiness I experienced in that period reminded me of my early days in one of my first jobs. I hated it. I cried many times driving home from that job. I still can remember the feeling I had the day I quit. It felt awesome!
The biggest lesson I have learned is that you can be passionate about your work but if there is no work-life balance, you’ll crash and burn sooner or later.
Don’t kill your passion. Act before it’s too late.